Posted by: kimothy | September 26, 2009

Photoblog ambitions

I’m settling into NYC, though I don’t really have any spare cash to go out and do anything exciting that I want to do, like taking classes. I would love to take some random classes to start actually meeting people. But, I probably won’t have the means to do so for a while.

So, I need to find something to do on weekends that is a) free, and b) not sitting in front of the computer messing around on the internet all day. My first plan was reading more, and I opened a library account. And I do plan to read more. But, I got an even better idea just now.

I am going to start a photoblog! I have a nice camera, and it’s digital. Meaning, taking pictures is free. So, I will go out on weekends and take pictures of things, photoshop them (I’m learning photoshop), and put them up online. I can have a different theme each weekend or something. I’ll pick a few choice pictures each week and talk about them, instead of just dumping all my pictures on Shutterfly (though I’ll still do that). It’ll get me through the long lonely weekends, I’m hoping.

So, stay tuned for my new photoblog, coming soon! I need a name… suggestions welcome. Theme suggestions are also welcome.

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Posted by: kimothy | September 17, 2009

Snippets

  1. I think too much.
  2. My life is less than ideal right now, and talking about it makes me unhappy, so I am declining to do so.
  3. NYC is a fun city. Unless you have to live in it. I guess I’m weird for thinking that way.
  4. Fall weather is nice.
  5. Pandora is awesome. Why is there a limit now? It’s lametastic.
  6. I’ve run out of things to blog about.
  7. Any suggestions?
  8. No, my life is not an option. My life is getting boring now, anyway.
Posted by: kimothy | August 24, 2009

New Job, New Thoughts

I realized just now that I have totally unrealistic expectations for myself.

I started my new job today. I’m working for a small energy auditing and design engineering company… so small that I’m one of the very first employees. Today consisted of meeting in a coffee shop, and I got the entire job explained to me before lunch. Then I went home to start playing with some of the new software I have to use.

Of course, being me, I started panicking that I have so much to learn… clients are being lined up for me, and I have to get certified in like 20 different things and I have to learn all kinds of standards and language. I feel like I wasted the afternoon thinking about all that I should be doing and learning, and not knowing how I could possibly meet all of my boss’s expectations.

I then realized I expect myself to come about things naturally, that I don’t give myself time to learn things, that I can’t be in the dark about anything. I am so unbelievably terrified of letting someone down, of disappointing people, whether it be my boss, a client, a friend, or my mom. I can’t be new at something. Why do I think that way?

I have always wanted to please people, to make them happy, to make them smile, to make their lives better. Or, to do my job so well that I’m an immediate asset to anything. More often than not, that all has been at the expense of my own wants or feelings. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think I’m some kind of selfless martyr who deserves sainthood or something. But I do need to be more assertive and less of a pushover.

And, I just somewhat convinced myself, it’s ok that I know nothing about what I’m supposed to do for my new job, because it’s my new job. No one is perfect on the first day of their first real job. Myself included, much as I wish I were immediately good at everything I attempt.

Trying to stay positive…. trying so hard…

Posted by: kimothy | August 13, 2009

NYC: an update.

So. I have moved to NYC. I live on Wall Street. 2 blocks away from the NYSE. Awesome, huh?

The first week or so was, to say the least, not awesome. Moving in was horrible, driving a UHaul in and around the city was one of the worst experiences of my life, and the weather has been disgustingly hot and humid. All in all, not a good first impression of the city, and some days I just want to pretend never existed.

But I’ve had a couple days to settle in a little bit, and hide in my apartment that is slowly becoming livable, and I’m feeling more optimistic about things. As somewhat of a documentation for myself, I am going to make a list of the things I like, and the things I don’t like, about the city as of right now. I want to see how they change as I get used to living here.

Things I Like:

  • I’m living in Downtown Manhattan. It feels quite safe walking around even at night, much more so than Brooklyn would have been, I think. The streets are busy during the day, but it quiets down at night, which I like; I’m not really a night life person.
  • Rent is dirt cheap for this area of the city. Yay recession!
  • I enjoy riding the subway. People-watching on the subway is way fun. There are so many interesting characters. Just the other day I saw a little Hispanic man playing a guitar on the subway (not just in the station). And today I saw a guy flat-out dancing with his headphones on… it was like an iPod commercial.
  • There are four major subway stations within a block of where I live. How convenient!
  • I like the anonymity. I’ve found I don’t really care what I look like when I go out to run errands, because the chances of meeting someone I know are very small. Practically nothing.
  • There is a lot to do. I just have to find things. That’s the hard part.

Things I Don’t Like:

  • The city is HUGE. I realized that I was going into this thinking that I had to learn the complete layout of the city and all the subway/bus routes and everything from the get-go. That, needless to say, is a very daunting task. And nigh impossible. And, not necessary in the slightest.
  • The scads of creepy people on the sidewalks. You know, all the homeless people who talk to themselves, or the mentally challenged people who talk at other people (I saw a woman being affronted at a bus stop by a creepy old man today). On a side note, I think it’s really weird when people walk down the street talking to themselves. People who seem perfectly mentally stable. It’s just… weird. That is all.
  • The weather is kind of sucky right now… I hate humidity. So much. I’m sick of being sweaty all the time and wilting every time I go outside. My apartment has AC, but I use it sparingly so energy costs are low. But that brings me to another point.
  • I wish I were living alone. It’s not that I don’t like the people I’m living with. But I didn’t realize until now how sick I am of having to share space. Even if I keep my costs down by barely running the AC, turning lights off, unplugging things, there’s no guarantee that I will actually pay less. I have to pay for other people’s use of things. And since we’ve prorated everything since the rooms are all really different, it’s complicated and probably not 100% fair for anyone. Also, having to buy common furniture and such like a couch and things… not something I would have done living alone. Not right away, at least. Space is at a premium in the city, and buying a lot of furniture is kind of stupid. All I could think of when I was hauling my IKEA stuff around before assmbling it was moving out is going to be a bitch. And an expensive bitch. But that is 14 months away.
  • The uncertainty of my job. But that will change soon, I hope. I start in 10 days, maybe sooner if I finish settling in.
  • The city is effing expensive. And dirty.

There you have it. My initial thoughts on the city. I haven’t taken my camera out for a spin yet… hopefully the weather will dry out a little bit soon so I can go walk around for a while and not sweat myself to death. That’s a pleasant image.

Hopefully things will continue to look up… I think this city thing could work. I don’t know how my job will be yet, and that will probably be a big factor in my opinion of life here. But we shall see.

Posted by: kimothy | July 29, 2009

A way to waste time.

I lifted this from a friend’s Facebook notes… Usually I don’t do these random questions things, but this one peaked my interest, and what else is summer for than being uber lazy and wasting time? It’s quite long, and probably not that interesting to a lot of people, so I won’t be offended if you don’t read all of it.

Ridiculously long questionnaire thingy!

So from now on, you’re going to be asked unique questions, you ready?
Obv.
Read More…

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